**Quick Update**
The surprise for Mom had to be postponed. Weather. That's all I can say. It's still a surprise :) We're rescheduling.
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There's a quote from this old Reese Witherspoon movie (as old as a Reese Witherspoon movie can be) "The Man in the Moon", where Reese's characters older sister says something along the lines of, "What's it like to feel everything?" And I come back often to that line. Because I feel everything. My emotions run a daily express train through gratitude, love, fear, anger, acceptance, hope, joy, anger, and everything in between. . And mostly? Just pure happiness. Because despite my numerous flaws, and mistakes, and the daily grind of life:
"Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst... And then I remember to relax, and stop trying to hold on to it, and then it flows through me like rain and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life..."
-American Beauty
Long ago I discovered that I'm a restless soul, loving, needing, craving change; the out of the ordinary. I like surprises, and for the plan to change. I don't like routine, it makes me itchy. I'm not afraid of new things. It's getting stuck in a rut that frightens me.
My parents like to say that I always do things the hard way, and that's probably true. It's completely true, actually. But the hard way has taught me more than I'd ever imagined; strength, courage, how to maneuver in this big world, and most importantly that I have so much more to learn.
The past few weeks are a perfect example . I changed jobs, set up a grown-up budget, and am moving in two weeks. And I realized this weekend that my family loves cute bf almost as much as I do. My soul feels more settled than it ever has before. And everyday I wake up with a smile on my face- ready to do it all again or for the first time.
Somewhere I got off track.....feelings. Oh I'm a bundle of feelings. I'm an emotional being. I deeply feel things so I am always aware of how I feel, and concerned with how others feel (though I don't always get that across properly) I'm still working on respecting and protecting my needs and feelings while being cautious of others.
I don't know where I'm going with all this. Maybe I don't need to wrap everything up in a pretty conclusion bow. So I'll leave you with this quote:
"Everyone has dreams, and even if yours didn't work out the way you wanted it doesn't make me any less proud of you. Too many people never really try."
-Three Weeks with my Brother by Nicholas Sparks
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