Oh September. You bitch.

I'm still here. At work. Tearing my newly highlighted hair out.

To say today has been busy is the understatement of the year. Ok, the century.

I didn't eat. I don't know where I left my sanity (I think I last saw it behind the dumpster, crouching in fear). At one point I told my most annoying manager, "Leave me the hell alone. I'm only one person!!" He persisted in his absolutely annoying way. As I juggled two phones and four phone calls, researched something for a lender, made lists for our special event tomorrow, and printed hundreds of price stickers for the new inventory, I pondered my options:

1. Go crazy. Just drop it all. Start drooling, and do some sort of Native American ritual dance.
2. Take things one by one and handle them efficiently and calmly.
3. Cry.
4. Call my Mom and cry.
5. Go next door, get a 40 and join the homeless guys out back for a good old fashioned binge.

And what did I do? A combination of 1 & 2. I got firm. I said NO to what wasn't absolutely necessary. I did what I could as fast and as well as I could. And I still feel like it wasn't enough.

Is it ever though?

I don't know. But I do know this. I like being in charge. I like delegating. I like having the answers that people need. When I touch something and it all falls into place, I feel good. I feel vital.

This job, this life, isn't easy. But done the right way it's fun. And it makes me feel useful and successful. At the end of this day (if it ever ends) I will kick off my shoes, feel that pedal under my feet, and the cool breeze through the window. I will sing along to something loud and fantastic, and I will know that I did my best. I couldn't have done any better.

And my best?

My best is pretty damn good.